For fun and love of writing, I have decided to divulge my past “note-worthy” relationships giving a brief story and final thought on each. Besides being intrigued, you never know, you might even see the effects of letting someone go you shouldn’t or staying with someone you DEFINITELY shouldn’t. Either way, the main intentions of the post are completely lighthearted for entertainment, so please enjoy.
Joyfully burdened with the power of my own independence, at some points in my day, I found myself thinking about my ex’s – nothing strenuous, just harmless contemplation mainly focused on my first ever relationships, oddly enough. In an Australian world where no more do I know the whole town and their dog, that inevitable portion of brain-thoughts reserved for boys is still available but instead of being used for present encounters, it’s decided to reminisce on my pre-encounters, go figure! In an attempt to challenge why such thoughts exist, I thought best I’d pen the past down, see if it stays there whilst hopefully learning a few things myself.
But first, in fear that one in particular might sue me with their “imaginary lawyer” I use to hear so much about, I have avoided names hiding their identity and comically using a celebrity photo to represent them instead. Enjoy!
In no particular order:
This one is in the least of my thoughts but it felt fun to write something creative: This rotten apple painfully hangs amongst the fresh and vibrant avoiding his self-hatred by carefully choosing the fruit that seems easy-for-the-picking and in doing so, takes desperate bites out of their sweetness, poisoning their crisp flavour. Rotten to the core, one by one he carefully plucks all the friendly apples that hang around her convincingly professing she was the apple of his eye.
Continuously biting chunks throughout time that stood still, he attempted to strip her down to her own very core – his intention; to pull every ambitious fruit from the shining sun before they ripen dragging them into the dark pit that was his own existence.
Eventually bruising the skin, she thought, it doesn’t ring true that an apple a day keeps the doctor away – for it actually takes just one bad apple to spoil a whole barrel, especially if you don’t spot it and destroy immediately.
Bravely escaping the darkness deemed her future, she has now grown her own tall tree that flourishes in the day-light with strong branches supporting her existence and the independence for dreams to grow.
Originally brought up in a country rocked by violence and political crisis, how could someone so pure and undamaged grace not just this very earth but my very own existence. The most kind-natured and sexiest species I’d met at the time was my boyfriend over 10 years ago. The travel bug really began with this one; we had mini holidays all over Europe and he wasn’t just my partner in crime, he was my best friend which was ultimately what killed us in the end. Before this boyfriend, I don’t recall having a seriously “fucked up” relationship and maybe our mutual care-free pureness in life rewarded one another with each other. Sadly but surely, slowly the friendship grew stronger than the romance and our time was up – even the tattoo of my name on his thigh didn’t save us. With what I know now, I would have tried harder to reunite our love because he was everything I could ever want.
Maybe not meeting in the ideal setting being in Sourcebar at 2.00am, my blurry vision didn’t allow me to send a text and in asking the best looking guy who luckily sat next to me, love-hearts began developing in my already dis-functioning eyes.
What followed was a series of messy Saturday nights and our eventual development into being a couple. He was very handsome, extremely funny and although curiously elusive at times, we eventually moved in together and shared a cute little flat. I got myself back into working in Television paired with my love for him, my constant passion of solo partying and staying out all night. I felt like I would never want anyone else despite our own demons landing on each others shoulders to support disallowing us to focus on our own problems. I thought, no ones perfect so perhaps we could be perfectly imperfect together? What followed was a lot of imperfection but unfortunately, not together which pushed us apart even more. My regrettable behaviour rocked his boat so hard surfacing past issues causing a dramatic imbalance which couldn’t be fixed. I definitely ruined this relationship and it succeeded in haunting me for years to come not just breaking his heart, but mine too.
Filling a void from a past relationship, I took to partying and quickly found an appropriate match with this pretty out-there character. Initially disliking him from first impressions, I was told he was actually alright and gave him another chance. From what I know, he did try his best to catch me when I fell and despite the majority of our relationship being physical, we did connect and although I tried to stay loyal, I can’t confidently say he was with either of the species. Something lovable exudes him even with flaws like myself – my sisters particularly liked him calling him a safe person. We knew it wasn’t going to be anything that stuck and admittedly, I feel there was a world in our relationship I had no idea about still to this day but what I do know, the majority was alright and luckily for both, we came out unharmed, I think? Purely a partying relationship, it stopped when the music ended. I am still unsure of who he really is – I know he has a good heart but wonder why he takes the piss sometimes, hopefully he’s figured this all out by himself.
My first day at school I spotted my destined high school sweetheart unaware I would be rendered love-sick for the whole of my secondary years. A popular kid the year above me; his long hair flowed and I wanted him to be my very own Hanson boyfriend – even his brother had long hair! Four years passed and on his last day of school after arranging to take someone else to prom, he took my number and called me straight after. We spoke for hours and hours every night and soon we became everything to each other. He joined sixth form and when I left school, he accompanied me to my prom. After a year together, I was out in the world attending college, meeting new people and he had a new job in town. We sadly drifted apart – I think he met a girl at work who he was still with and I flourished in my post-school freedom leaving him behind.
He tried so hard to get me back, I said no, I should have said yes – what more did I want? By recently having dreams about him, I followed the acts of Adele’s “Hello” but true to her song, it clearly doesn’t tear him part anymore – but hopefully, at least he can see that I tried.
In conclusion – If you don’t love yourself, date yourself until you do – figure out who you are and what you need to be happy – if you don’t and just paint over any damage, any one you meet will be a actual disaster!
Or, just embrace the glorious mess you’ve become!
THE CONTENT IS PURELY FICTIONAL.
Katie Babb 